Thursday, May 12, 2011 was a very exciting day for our family. It was the day I was able to tell Kelly we were expecting our 2nd baby! Little did we know what all was in store for our precious baby.
The weeks flew by and I barely had time to really pay attention to the pregnancy due to a very energetic 2-year old daughter. June.... July.... and August flew by and our 19-week ultrasound came around quickly. The month prior to our appt., Kelly & I battled back and forth between finding out the sex of the baby. I kept telling him how much I felt as though we were pregnant with a little boy and was able to convince him that we needed to find out for sure!
When Tuesday, August 30, 2011 arrived, Kelly & I were anxious to go to our appt. for the ultrasound. We took a few pictures in anticipation of seeing our sweet new baby!
Little did we know that the rest of our life would be forever changed from that 19-week ultrasound..
I remember lying down on the table ready to see our baby. The first shot we saw was his/her head. The only words we heard were "I need to get Dr. Chappell, there are some problems." I remember looking at Kelly and having tears run down my face with fear. Dr. Chappell came in & told us that it seemed as though our baby showed signs of Hydrocephalus. Oh how I wish to this day that was what we were really dealing with, but it wasn't. We went ahead and did the blood work to know if there was anything else we would be going through.
The following Tuesday, September 6, 2011 we received the phone call that my blood-work came back positive for Trisomy 18. For women my age, it's typically "1 out of 3500," but for me I showed up as "1 out of 10." The fear rose greatly. Trisomy babies do not survive long after birth - a week... maybe a month.... some survive a few months. I was crushed and devastated at the news I received that day. For the next week, I prayed & pleaded with the Lord to heal our son. I questioned how He could let this happen. The Lord is sovereign and He did not do this to our child. These devastating incidents happen because sin came into the world. Our bodies are not perfect, and things like this do happen, but praise be to God that we have eternity to look forward to where we will be perfected & our imperfections will be nonexistent.
The following week, we went to the Atlanta Perinatal Specialists for another ultrasound, and chose to do the Amnio so we would know 100% what we were being faced with. It felt like eternity waiting on our results. We received the early test results on Thursday, Sept. 8, 2011 which explained that our baby boy, Joshua, did not have Trisomy 18 - he had Triploidy. This means that instead of having 46 chromosomes - 23 from mommy, and 23 from daddy - baby Joshua had 69. They explained that this was not compatible for life. Most triploidy babies end as miscarriages. The few that make it into the 2nd & 3rd trimester end in stillbirths. Only about "1 out of 10,000" are actually born alive before passing shortly thereafter. Thankfully we found out that this is an extremely rare situation and is nothing that is hereditary. We will definitely be able to have more children, if that is what the Lord has planned for us!
We spent the following morning, Friday Sept. 9, 2011 talking with the Genetic Counselor at Northside Hospital. She explained that we had two options - to terminate the pregnancy or to continue the pregnancy until the baby passes. First of all, those should never be options during a pregnancy...... Parents should never have to go through the pain of losing a child. However, once again, because sin entered the world, it is one circumstance that is very common. Kelly & I chose to continue the pregnancy. Our pregnancy was the only time we were going to have with our baby boy. It is definitely hard to wake up each day with the reminder that things are not "normal" for us this time around. However, I am reminded of the Lord's grace everything I feel baby Joshua kick in the womb, or listen to his heartbeat. Kelly has been able to feel him kick once, which was a huge answer to prayer.
Where are we now? As of today, we're almost 24-weeks pregnant, and baby Joshua seems to be quite happy in my womb. I'm sure he's pretty cozy! We have good day & bad days, and I'm sure they'll both continue. We are trying to prepare ourselves for the day that the Lord takes our baby boy home with Him. At the same time, we're also trying to enjoy each moment that he is here with us during this pregnancy. We have no idea how many days we have left, but words cannot describe how thankful we are to already have had 24 weeks with him already!
We are so thankful for everyone who has been praying for us and continues to pray for us. My daily prayer is for the Lord to heal our son. However, that may not happen until the Lord calls him home, but baby Joshua will be healed & perfected. I am so thankful that we have eternity to look forward to so that we will see our baby boy again!
For those of you always asking what you can do for our family during this time. Your prayers are the best thing for us! We feel the Lord's peace daily about our decisions during this process, and the events that have yet taken place. Continue to pray that we are surrounded by the Lord's love and peace during this time. Pray that we feel joy as we meet our baby boy in the coming weeks & say "see you later" on that same day. Because of our gracious Father in Heaven, it's always going to be "see you later," because there are never any goodbyes as brothers & sisters in Christ.
We will continue to update periodically on our progress and how things are going! Thank you again for all of your prayers and kind thoughts.
A few thoughts that has kept me going.......
During every good & bad circumstance, do you put your trust in the Lord? Do you trust Him to fulfill His will and what is best for our lives?
In the midst of brokeness, cling to the Lord & trust His goodness. Even when things seem extremely dark and the end is not in sight, remember that He is the one that sees the entire picture & He is the one that can bring you through any circumstance!
Blessings by Laura Story
'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.".
Matthew 11:28
